Alternate Exit

I loved fire drills when I was a schoolboy. One minute you were stuck at a desk, and the next moment you were allowed - even required! - to go outside. I always wished we would have a fire drill every week (you can tell I don't remember too many rainy or cold fire drills, BTW).

In 1965 one of our fire drills was different.

It wasn't because there was a real fire - that would have been less weird.

When we (Mrs. Morrison's 5th graders) got to our exit door, there stood our Principal - Mr. Hackler. He was wearing a red beanie and yellow work gloves and holding a red flag in each hand. Around his neck hung a sign that simply said, "FIRE".

I like to think that if it had been a real fire blocking our exit we would have done a better job of reacting (by, say, proceeding directly to our alternate exit). Instead we more or less held an impromptu meeting. Some kids asked Mr. Hackler what we were supposed to do - but he was busy being the Fire, and he wasn't any help. I'm pretty sure that our teachers had been instructed not to talk, as well.

Some kids pointed out that it was still possible to get around Mr. Hackler, but by then we had pretty much figured out that this was a test of some sort. That's when we more or less 'voted' to head for the alternate door - which was further away & IN THE WRONG DIRECTION for us to go for a fire drill.

I point out that it was IN THE WRONG DIRECTION so that I can be a little more forgiving of our 5th-Grade selves. It is a fearsome thing (or at least it was in 1965) to go in ANY direction except the normal one. Remember that this is around the era immortalized in "A Christmas Story" (aka - The BB-Gun Movie - the one with Ralphie). There is that great moment when the recess bell rings and they all desert their friend who has just become frozen to the flagpole by accepting a dare to lick it. Why do they leave him there? As Ralphie 'explains' - "I don't know. The BELL rang!"

We didn't easily decide to go in aberrant directions - but sometimes the Fire is real.

Sometimes there really is a brick wall in our way. Sometimes we figure out that continuing on in the way we expect to go will not only be impossible - it may hurt us to try to hang on to Plan A.

Thank God for Plan B (& C, D, E, etc.) - even though it's almost always painful to turn away from Plan A. There just may be life outside that alternate exit.